as a wise tot once said,

"Patience Jackass". Yes, the tot was me and no, I'm not practicing what I preached. I suggested we let Eric open one present this evening. Then I thought it would be better if we each opened one. One turned to two. Eric went first. We played a joke on him and gave him a hint that his new guitar was an updated Squier.

Boy, was he surprised to open the Squier box and find a sunburst Stratocaster with gold hardware.

Cosme's turn...

"Sweet!" Cosme opened his GPS and golf clubs. The funny thing about the clubs is he saw the package and thought it was a fountain for the flower bed. (He thought that sounded like something my mother and I would scheme up after the whole "doesn't he need a bench for his birthday?") Yeah, I got a picture of his expression as he opened the clubs but his eyes were shut - I figure after posting the karaoke shot I'd go easy on him.

my turn...

I opened my photo printer (which might have come in handy during the Christmas card dilemma...see post below) and a digital frame. Score!

signed, sealed,

not delivered. I didn't get my Christmas cards out. I waited until the last minute to get a picture made. Since we couldn't agree on a picture, nobody has a card. So here's the alternative...

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!

(Hey, that's faster than the USPS could deliver anyway!)

Yes, there's a story behind the cards not being sent out (make note of this entry). Anyway, I won't get into all that. This picture wasn't nominated for the card but it will go into a frame somewhere in this house. If you'd like to see the other pictures, check out the Flickr link.

party like it's...

well, last weekend. Cosme's office's Christmas party was last weekend. (Yeah, my hair's red but the glow of the ribbons on the tree are making it red to the extreme.) We stayed at the party a while and then headed to Wild West. Yes, you read correctly. This duo headed to a c&w bar. The crazier part of that story is we were dancing to hip-hop as well as c&w. By the way, Cosme did the Cotton-Eyed-Joe for the first time. (I couldn't believe he hadn't learned it in elementary school. I learned it in p.e. - and that was in the city!) Anyway, a few hours later (as well as a few drinks later) Cosme braved the crowd and told me to pick a song for his moment in the spotlight...yeah, karaoke. I gave him three choices: Elvis, The Cult or Johnny Cash. Needless to say, he chose The Cult. So, a little "She Sells Sanctuary" it was. He was told there were people in the back making the typical headbanger hand gestures while bobbing their heads. It was a total rockstar moment. Yeah, yeah, I admit that I was hollering and clapping. The next day he was saying he couldn't believe he got up and did it. Guess what, he can believe it now because one of his co-workers got a lovely shot of it.

Exhibit A:

and why

does it matter what Oprah thinks? Oh, that's right, it doesn't! I don't know what's more pathetic...that people need to take advice from a rags-to-riches talkshow host on everything from books to politicians OR that those people (such as Oprah) believe us people without celebrity status cannot think for ourselves. Seriously, what makes Oprah's opinion of who the next Presdient should be any different from Melanie's...nothing. If I could say one thing to Ms. Winfrey, it would be this, "please shut up and go away. your ramblings on don't mean squat in life outside Harpo." So, Oprah, Barbra, Sean Penn, Ben Affleck, etc...believe it or not, the majority of Americans have minds of their own and don't need your input...thanks anyway.

I would get started on Brad Pitt and his quest to save the world with our help, but I'm so sick of it all I can't bring myself to ruin a perfectly good morning.

UPDATE: at Mom's request, the picture of Oprah Winfrey was removed because "it doesn't deserve to be posted".

biscotti

I made it today for the first time. It was so easy and pretty tasty. (It's topped with almond bark.) I'm ready to try out all sorts of variations now!

and from out of nowhere

came the zombies...pitchfork-wielding farm zombies. No, not really.

This was on my way home from taking Eric to school. The fog was really bad for a couple of days. I thought this land on 521 would offer an eerie picture. Breakfast was being served on the other side of the highway.